Now I open my post with my closing message:
If you need help, don't be afraid or embarrassed to ask for it, if you think you've had enough, reach out another time and make this call:
The National Suicide Prevention Hotline can be reached at: 1.800.273.TALK (8255) or 1.800.SUICIDE (784.2433).
Tonight I learned of the passing of a friend and brother of my fraternity. A hard working, proud friend, who cared deeply about his family, his beliefs and helping others. I can not lie, when I learned of his passing I went to one of two columns: heart attack or stroke?
While I was not prepared to learn of his loss, actually I had fully expected him to post soon on my recent links in Facebook, see while we didn't always agree on things, I know we had a mutual respect for each other that far and above transcended our differing views on politics and world events.
I was left speechless to learn of the means of his passing.
I am not here to judge - I know that I don't know.
I know through the training I've received that has seen me assist others in helping themselves to take advantage of 72 hours of assistance and given me strength to be there for others who have made threats that led to my spending many hours with them through the night that I do not and can not know where they are and what has brought them to such a point of pain.
What I do know, is that from when suicide became more than just a word to me when a favorite teacher attempted in high school and that day during Biology lab when a professor shared of the passing of a friend and asked me to notify others in my undergrad is that I can not know what is happening in a friend's mind when they reach that point.
However, what I and each of us can do - is remind all around us that there are people who can help. To simply get that loved one, friend or even the person you don't care that much about to simply connect with an agency like The National Suicide Prevention Hotline and/or a local counselor, clergy member, teacher, etc.
It pains me to know of my friend's passing and the questions it leaves me asking that I know I shouldn't be asking, however my loss in nothing compared to that of his family and the pain that drove him to make his final decision.
It is so common and cliche to state, "I would've never guessed (so & so) would do that, or was hurting that bad"
But that is the point - rarely do we know who is hurting that much or who has met and passed their threshold on pain in their current affairs.
We can not know that and that is why we need to let others know, we're there for them and so are people they've never met if they'd rather reach out to someone who is not part of their daily life.
I know we all have different experiences with suicide and quite frankly, I've known of or known more people who have attempted or completed than I wish to relive tonight or any night for that matter.
I know that no two situations are exactly the same, I know that I have no idea what they were thinking, I know that they were good people who had met a threshold and I know that the best thing I can do to honor them is to ask others to get help and help others find help so they can step back from that threshold. So, their families don't have to ask questions for which they will never have answers and so that they can have another chance to one day laugh, debate, share, love and make a difference in the world.
You have moved onto hold another fort my brother and you need to know we still love you and hold you dear, you will remain a respected member of our fraternal family and our lives.
The National Suicide Prevention Hotline can be reached at: 1.800.273.TALK (8255) or 1.800.SUICIDE (784.2433).
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